Ethelwynn, I know, not the best archer ever, and another example how glad I am about the invention of CGI
And I will stop any Faramir-bashing, I swear by the precioussss! But then the question is, who else may I bash? Aragorn is just too serious, Gandalf too wise, Legolas too gorgeous, Gimli has been bashed enough in the movie, Frodo and Sam too brave, Pippin's accent too cute, Merry too smart, Arwen too beautiful, Eowyn too courageous.....what about Glorfindel? I mean with the behaviour one could observe in Edoras, he actually deserves it. He was seen in the stables, chatting with Legolas:
G: Argh, women...they ridiculed me so badly at Minas Tirith, I can't set a foot in there for the next 500 years. Such a shame, they've got the most handsome girls there...
L: Well, I guess the news haven't reached Edoras yet, or do you think our favourite dawrf will spread them? You could always go for Rohirric girls to survive the next 500 years.
G: Noooo, never! They smell of horse!
L: So what? Do you think your Asfaloth smells better?
G: Asfaloth is a different topic. He may, and he's my greatest love anyways. But girls smelling of horse? Wah, never. And girls fighting? Even worse!
L: So you wouldn't want to feel weak opposite a girl good at fighting? What do you think about Eowyn then?
G: That's exactly the example. I don't know how Faramir can do that. I mean, how is he supposed to look brave next to her? She's killed the Witch King! All my showing off here is in vain, these days nobody talks of the Balrog any more, only Witch King here, Witch King there....argh, women....
L: Poor guy...better go hunt some orc, 500 years pass quicker than you might think.

And we know that Legolas is an excellent shot, even if Orlando isn't. Just like Faramir is probably a good horseman, even if David Wenham can't manage to stay in the saddle.

Orlando Bloom does not need to be a good bowman, it's enough he's absolutely gorgeous

I wasn't belittling David Wenham's riding ability, just commenting on how much he appeared to be...er...enjoying himself in the EE commentary

If you two keep bashing Faramir's riding ability I may have to bring up the fact that Orlando Bloom cannot shoot. I've seen the documentary where he's "showing off his ability with a longbow" and I laugh myself sick. He's not even 20 yards from he target, and his spread is the size of a dinner plate.

Exactly that bit. In general, I cannot take the whole charge towards Osgiliath serious any more, especially his close-ups. And people then wonder why I burst out laughing even though the scene is so dramatic and the music really touching...

I know what bit you mean, Naela, gives a whole new meaning to honeymooning on horseback.......

And our poor thread nearly fell off the cliff back to the second page again! We may never admit that, right?
And to make this not a pure spam post, just a little romantic honeymoon-scene, our lovers are preparing to set off on their horses:
Faramir, looking around in the stable: So, my dear, which horse should I take?
Eowyn: Hm, good question, Eomer said that if you take one of his, he is going to kill you in the most cruel way possible. You could take the brown one over there, it's a half-brother of Aragorn's Roheryn.
Faramir: But isn't Roheryn a rather wild one?
Eowyn: Of course he is, all our horses are rather wild, and quick, oh yes, quick.
Faramir: Hm, I'm not quite sure...shouldn't we take some tamer horses for our honeymoon?
Eowyn: Tame horses? This is going to be a shieldmaiden's honeymoon, not a sightseeing trip, my dear. And how are we supposed to hunt orcs riding swift wargs without fast horses? I hope you are used to galopping over difficult terrain?
Faramir: Erm, well, I did take riding lessons on the Pelennor fields when I was a boy....Are you sure we can't just take nice, kind horses and then walk? Oh, and darling, where is my helmet?
Eowyn: Helmet? Do you think I'll ride with you into the sunset if you wear this Gondorian thing on your head and look like an egghead?
Faramir: Well, you know, I had some safety concerns...
in that moment, Gamling enters the stables: Oh, my lord Faramir, I think now that you are married to our lady Eowyn, you should urgently rethink the level of safety you require.....

(Sorry for bashing Faramir's riding ability but after I've seen the documentary about the horse scenes, I just can't imagine Faramir as any good on a horseback any more...)

Elanor - yes, 5 pages indeed, I could hardly believe my eyes. We must never let this happen again

Now this is how Faramir's day continues:
Shaking his head and mumbling something like "Oh, Faramir, you idiot...there is no way back now! But what if she gets hurt?" when bumping into Eomer.
Eomer, rather angry: Ah, Mister Minas Tirith, I have been looking for you.
Faramir: Me???
E: Exactly. I have heard a rumour and hope, for your sake, that you can honestly deny it.
F, slightly uncomfortable: Which is?
E: You don't really take my sister with you to hunt some orcs in Ithilien, do you?
F: Well, erm, it's a bit difficult to explain, in fact, I am, sort of, kind of...err...basically, yes.
E: Yes what?
F: Yes, hunting orcs.
E: How could you? Are you mad? Taking my innocent little sister into such a danger? What if she gets injured? You should defend your wife, not lead her into the greatest danger in whole Middle Earth! Never will I admit that!
F, suddenly getting angry and determined: First of all, she is a grown-up woman and would probably be quite annoyed if I deny this little adventure to her. Secondly, she might not agree with the term "innocent". And thirdly, I am sure she can defend herself.
E: No, she can't! She would always bring herself in trouble, and as her brother and King of Rohan it is my duty to protect her, if her husband apparently is unable to do so. (Puts himself into a rather majestic-arrogant pose)
F, suddenly grinning: I am sorry to disappoint you but in fact, I can think of an episode where this very woman defended the King of Rohan, even quite well one would say. A witch-king was involved as well, and I think if she can deal with Nazgul, a few orcs are just a light exercise in the afternoon.
E: Pah, you Gondorians were always good at talking, I'm not discussing this matter any further with you. I will take to my sister now and convince her to stay in safety. MAybe she just does it because she thinks you need a bodyguard, an opinion I cannot wholly deny. (Walks off)
F: Good luck then, I hope you survive her answer....

Isn't it women who believe "aisle altar hymn"?

I hope Faramir remembers that people really don't change after marriage

Oh, wonderful, Naela - you have a real feel for this genre

5 pages back? Someone must have been posting a lot of rubbish then

As it is really unacceptable that I have to scroll through five pages until I find this thread again, I thought it is my urgent duty to revive it with a short account of a scene I accidentally overheard before the wedding in Edoras. In the beginning, only Aragorn and Faramir stood together, by the side of the Golden Hall smoking some pipeweed.
Aragorn: So, do you have any plans for your honeymoon?
Faramir, smiling happily: Yes, indeed I do have plans. I want to take Eowyn on the most romantic journey I have ever made and show her the beauties of Gondor I have explored in my childhood and youth, meadows covered by flowers of all colours, rolling hills, majestic mountains. I also want her to meet my relatives in Dol Amroth, Prince Imrahil was so happy to hear we will have such a wonderful woman in our family now.
Aragorn: Wow, now that sounds really impressive. Only I doubt that Eowyn likes romantic trips as much as you do. Are you planning to go to Ithilien, too?
Faramir: Oh, I am sure she will like it. She has become much calmer over the last weeks. Well, I will have to go to Ithilien after the honeymoon but I will not lead her there for our trip. Until it is cleared of all orcs and other evil beings, I want her to stay in Edoras in safety. I will go there with some rangers to hunt orcs by your leave.
Aragorn: Of course, good plan, killing orcs is never a bad idea.
In thie very moment, Eowyn comes around the corner: Oh, have I heard something about killing orcs?
Aragorn: No no, we were just talking about the wedding.
Faramir: Yes, indeed my love, nothing about orcs at all.
Eowyn: I am sure I heard orcs. But alas, you need not have secrets from me, Faramir - I can guess what you are plotting and it is the most lovely thing you've ever done for me!
Faramir (smiling broadly): Oh, my dear, how do you know about the honeymoon I'm planning? Did Legolas tell you?
Eowyn: No, but I can guess, and yes, I will come with you!
Faramir, with a short look to Aragorn: I knew you would enjoy a romantic trip. Only Aragorn wasn't so sure.
Eowyn: My lord Aragorn, how could you doubt that? I have never heard of a better honeymoon than going to Ithilien together and hunt some orcs!
Faramir, quite baffled: Erm, dear, that was not exactly the plan....
Eowyn: Now it is too late, you can't hide it from me any more, your secret is out! And for arranging this I love you the more! Who else would grant his wife the pleasure of achieving great deeds even after a wedding?
Aragorn, pats Faramir's shoulder: Yes, he's a very noble and loving romantic man indeed. I better leave you alone now...
Eowyn: So romantic! I can't wait it! And if you want me to, I will try to look surprised when you announce our destination in public.
Faramir: Yes, my love, that was a surprise indeed....

...Ah, but you forget, in the Seventh Age, we have plastic surgery and pointy-ear implants! -they won't know until your first gray hair, and even then you can just call it "silver blonde".
...and if that works for you, I might change my ears, eat a few gallons of ice cream, sneak into Buckland, and make Mrs. Estella Brandybuck "disappear"... muahahaha.
Legolas can't compete with slaying a Balrog. -he hasn't died before either. Glorfindel at least has some dignity left, I guess. Anyway, back to the subject:
Now, if the bachlorette party gets dull, they can always get Glorfindel drunk and have him do Nazgul impressions or something.
I still say Merry and Pippin should dance for them. -something tells me they'd be good at it.
What will they eat? What time should it start and how long will it last?
What are they going to do to poor Glorfindel?
Any games? Bobbing for apples, archery, pin-the-tail-on-the-elf-boy? XD

Thanks a lot, Holdwine, but if I remember well only Elves are admitted to Undying Lands, with the only exception of Ring-bearers and Gimli. And I really fear I cannot join any of these categories

So, let's leave these very sad topics and go bad to the bachelorette party, which promises to be a much more funny thing - I like the idea of poor Glorfindel losing a bet against Legolas... at least our poor guy can confort himself remembering in the end he killed a Balrog...

Here's another link (same one): http://bri-chan.deviantart.com/art/coronation-gone-crazy-9558217

Oh, gosh! No! XD Poor Gimli!
Maybe Gimli also married an elf woman...? Hey, it could happen!
But that is a good point. The family trees aren't even finished for some of them. The index implied that Merry and Pippin both had sons (at least one each), but it doesn't even name Merry's son or mention if either had other children. It makes me wonder what Merry named his son. -Eomer, maybe? Or Theoden?
Tolkien left a lot for the readers' imagination, I guess. Or perhaps he just had a lot on his mind and couldn't possibly answer everyone's questions. I wonder if they ever found the entwives....

Kac mentioned dancers at Eowyn's bachlorette party; -how about Glorfindel? He might have lost a bet with Legolas. Muahaha. Either him or the hobbits.
Anyway, maybe Legolas went to the Undying Lands where he met Angelica, the love of his life!

Thanks Ethelwynn... we're sisters in our pain

By the way, I found a very nice comic on the web about this very same topic, I uploaded it amongst my shared photos on the board, so I hope it will be published in the next hours... In the meanwhile, you can see it here: http://tn3-1.deviantart.com/fs4/300W/i/2004/220/a/5/coronation_gone_crazy.jpg

{{{Hugs}}} I feel the same way about that Elf chick Aragorn married.

I know you're right, Ethelwynn. It's just... you know... I really envy his wife

That's a heck of a wait for a fellow. But what did you expect, Angelica? That a handsome, healthy, young Elf would remain celebate? It's marriage or something waaaayyyy more interesting to talk about . . .